here’s my contribution to your schadenfreude: (enjoyment obtained from the troubles of others).
Just about a year ago, I had hard chest pain at a public place with a medic on duty. It had lasted long enough that it had to be checked out. I asked if he’d take my blood pressure. He asked why and that’s when I lost control of my weekend. As soon as he heard “chest pain” he was obligated to call an ambulance.
So off I go to the E.R. for no apparent reason, as I was fine. BUT the results of my tests had to wait a day to be reviewed by a cardiologist. I had to spend the night.
That’s when I blew it. I had the nurse call my doctor. I asked him questions, told him how the staff was failing me (they were not giving me asthma medications), said I was going to leave no matter what and then I yelled at him. For about 3 or 10 sentences. I don’t even remember what I said. But I felt terrible about it and had to call him some days later to apologize. He said he didn’t remember it, but I think he was just being kind. Either that or he gets yelled at a lot.
Here’s the part you can laugh at: there is a post in my archives titled “Doctors and Communication: You don’t have to get angry” Go ahead. Guffaw.
Sometimes you don’t have to get angry might be more accurate. From other experiences coming to mind, being angry has made the difference in getting better care. Sometimes. I don’t think I’ve yelled before. Who knows what I’ll remember by this time tomorrow. At the very least I have to admit the truth. I was impatient, rude, accusatory, and I yelled! He didn’t deserve it. Someone did, but not him.
So communicate without anger? I’m trying. As one of my older sons would joke, “Mom, you’re the most trying person I know.”
a work in progress. that’s me.